DAY 1: Describe Your Personality

baby bangs, red lip, and thumb stuck between the teeth: weird but rare. plus the audacity of myself claiming that i am weird but rare.

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there is this one picture of mine painted by my father, hung on one of the sidewalls of my room. you can see it clearly - obvious, enormous - by the time you enter the room. it's me. my face was a color of chestnut - papa pictured it a bit darker than i actually was - with brick as its background, providing the nuance of warmth, exotic. hair rested on the shoulder, i was smiling so calmly - serene, peaceful - to the camera as it was behind me. my hip was kind of twisted, showing just the right side of my body. my posture was firm but relaxed. and the eyes, the eyes were round and sparkling, representing contentment, resilience, but also fragility at the same time, sensitive. every time i was sad, i was feeling oddly even worse when i look at the smiling picture, "why are you always smiling? you are not all that happy soul?" but every time i felt encouraged and motivated, i would stare at the picture and murmured "wow, you looked like a great, legendary woman!” sometimes i think i looked like a 67yo grandmother who spent the rest of her life contemplating about life whenever i began to sit nicely on my bed, looking straight to the picture, and letting my thoughts go to the other part of the world. i find satisfaction. the feelings are: complete, whole, but also small as one living individual. pretty much the same feeling whenever i join the crowd, socialize with people, and make connections. i found happiness in doing so and i think, i also feel, i did a great job on bringing myself as one happy soul. have i ever written “i wish laughter will always be there even if it’s in my hardest time.” perhaps that’s the reason why i was smiling in the picture: that’s the simple but ultimate key to happiness, to life.